I am fat. Nobody loves me. Nobody will ever love me. I am not good enough. Everyone hates me. I am worthless. I am unworthy of love. I don’t deserve to have friends. I don’t deserve to live. I hate myself.
Welcome to the thoughts of depression. These are the exact thoughts that rampage through my head as I endure depression and grief. The worst part of this is: I began to believe these thoughts. I still believe some of them. My therapist and I have been working on this little by little.
These thoughts have really sparked self-hatred in myself. It wasn’t until a wonderful and beautiful blogger read a blog I wrote one day and asked if I would say these things to someone else. And if I wouldn’t, why would I say them to myself? That really, I am abusing myself. This comment was an eye opener to me. This is exactly what I have been doing. I have been almost verbally abusing myself in my thoughts. And you know what? I don’t deserve this abuse anymore. I need to stop this self-abuse.