If you have been following my blog in the past day, you know that I am in a pretty bad place. My depression has spiraled out of control. I tried to allow myself to feel the pain of missing my parents and not be afraid of it. With work, I will be able to be less afraid of that pain. Progress will come with work and time.
Just now I went onto MSN and read an article about a little girl who was orphaned by a house fire. My heart broke more. Then, I realized, hey…..I need to stop brooding over my pain. I don’t actually have it that bad. I knew my mom for 15 years and my dad for 25. Those years were filled with love and laughter. They gave me everything I needed. Sure, I don’t have my parents right now, but I knew them. I have a roof over my head and food to eat every night. I have a stable job and clothes to put on my back. I don’t actually have it that bad.
I guess it is just hard to remember that fact during these times. I get so down in my depression that I forget there are starving children out on the streets. There are children who do not get to know their own parents. Sometimes a reminder of this is what I need to remember that I do actually have a good life.
I need to remember that while I grieve, there are still strangers I need to reach out to, whether it is through blogs or meetings on the street. I must not forget that I am here to serve people more than myself. That even though I am in grief, the hungry child on the street still needs food and clothes. They deserve that just as much as I look for my comfort.