Another Death Nightmare


I really, really, really didn’t want to write about this nightmare here, but I usually do because writing them gets them off my chest.  And this also allows me to refer to it when I talk to my therapist about it.  As I see him on Friday, I need to write it.  So here goes….

A few days ago, I had a dream that my father was dying again.  I was there WATCHING HIM DIE (Talk about a NIGHTMARE!).  He was taking his last breathes.  As this was happening, he looked over at me and whispered, “Come hug me.”  I nodded and did as told.  After a long hug, I whispered in his ear, “It’s okay dad.  Go be with mom.  I’m strong.  I’ll be okay here.”  I pulled away and dad’s eyes met mine.  The look told me that he knew I would be okay, but that he was worried about me.  I sat back down and he took his last breath and died.

So ya….WORST ONE I HAVE EVER HAD!!!!!!!!!! I don’t know if the concussion triggered it or what, but I haven’t had a “death of a parent” nightmare since mid-January.  I had a good track record going.  Maybe, it was because I didn’t see my therapist last week…I don’t know….Gah…I am going to the psych on Friday for a medication evaluation because I have been having a lot of meltdowns lately over my family and friend situations.  And choosing to just sleep all the time instead of deal with my thoughts.  Some days, I would be okay with sleeping all day.

 

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3 thoughts on “Another Death Nightmare

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  1. sliceoflife11 is right, your brain needs time to heal after the concussion! I know the nightmare was scary, but try to look at it for what it is, just a dream. When we sleep our brains try to sort out our memories and information. Clearly this was a “hello, pay attention to this!” from your body. Maybe you need to do some more work on that subject? Take care of yourself, we’re here for you!

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